Have you ever read the ingredients list on gluten-free bread? Like the man said, “it’s a f*ckin’ tragedy.” Longer list than the one with my creditors on it.
And gluten-free is still one of the most important dietary religions going.
INGREDIENTS:
unroasted buckwheat groats 500 g
water — for soaking plus 200 ml for blending
salt a pinch, well, a bit bigger pinch than that
METHOD:
Cover the buckwheat groats with warm water for 8 hours.
Drain.
Blend the groats smooth with the salt and 200 ml water.
Pour into a bowl.
Leave (see Notes) until it ferments, rises and stinks like the devil’s own foot.
Pour into a bread tin. Carefully, so it drops as little as possible.
Bake 70 minutes at 180°C.
NOTES:
Wild fermentation of buckwheat groats has the side effect of stinking something awful, so if you’re fermenting the batter in a bowl, cover it tight.
Fermentation at room temperature takes about 20 hours, so once again the bread maker proves its worth. I don’t know if all of them have this function — when buying, check there’s a programme that holds a steady 40°C for a dozen-odd hours. Different makers call it fermentation, culturing or yoghurt.
On mine it’s the last one, programme fifteen, running a dozen-odd hours and holding a steady 40°C.
Under these conditions the little loaf’s ready for baking in about 8 hours.
I make it when I’ve got guests on a gluten-free diet.
I usually set it fermenting at the end of the day, and in the morning, when I come in at five, the little loaf’s ready for baking. And stinking like the devil’s own foot.
The kind that hasn’t been washed in a long while.
Just so we’re clear. Various kinds of gluten intolerance are a genuine problem for 10% of the population.
A genuine problem. A problem that’s actually real.
Not a made-up one.
For years I’ve watched this gluten-free religion from behind the bar and the stove, and I get the feeling most people who walk into the place carrying a great big GLUTEN FREE placard have made that diagnosis up themselves.
Worse still, a lot of them confuse it with intolerance to the FODMAP group of carbohydrates.
Because those carbohydrates turn up in wheat, rye and barley (i.e. grains containing gluten), FODMAP intolerance routinely gets mixed up, in the internet/auto/pseudo-diagnosis process, with a reaction to gluten. Which, by the way, is a protein.
So yes, this one and one other gluten-free bread with a short, decent ingredients list — I serve both to my guests. And yes, for plenty of them it definitely helps. And yes, definitely not for the reason they think.
And I’d advise everyone to start by getting a proper diagnosis from a doctor, not some miracle-working quack. Who’s got a cure for every ailment, FODMAP intolerance included.
The kitchen is my space for lifestyle medicine.
I'm not a dietitian or a doctor – I'm a chef, and a member of the Polish Society of Lifestyle Medicine. Nutrition is essential to a modern kitchen, and that's nothing new: working from Hippocratic dietetic principles was part of a cook's craft centuries ago. At Rude Kitchen I tie that tradition to modern science — and to lifestyle. Read more about how I bring cooking and lifestyle medicine together on the About page.