Would you rather have diarrhea or constipation?

A tough choice, shamefully skipped when people talk about cooking.And yet, at the intake end of the digestive tract, there’s a cook, and at the exit end—a toilet cleaner. And yes, when you go vegan, your poop radiates goodness and cosmic light. Although sometimes it also stinks so badly that birds fall out of the … Read more

Is a Plant-Based Diet Healthy?

And how do you tell a crank from a reliable dietitian? A dietitian will say: It depends. Because if you eat fries, wash them down with Coca-Cola or beer, or even (or especially) vodka,then yes — that is a vegan diet.A vegan diet is unhealthy as hell. And if you eat a Mediterranean diet, with meat, of … Read more

January: Sober Or Plantbased?

    New Year’s resolutions are bullshit and fake, just like all those “miracle” life changes.Gyms and similar places, the entire industry built around healthy lifestyles and self-care, see a sales spike in January.And of course, food is part of that too. And of course, already in February, gym memberships and kale chips sales drop … Read more

Five Miracle Post-Holiday Detox Methods Are Fucking Bullshit

There’s no point stressing out. I mean: a few extra kilos. Or clenching your ass, thinking that from January you’ll start exercising. That’s what holidays are for — to indulge a bit. What is worth doing is ensuring that this indulgence doesn’t, sooner or later, lead to obesity, diabetes, or similar health issues. Disclaimer: I’m not a … Read more

Potato Spring Rolls

If there were a single image that could represent both Poles and Germans at once, it would be an image of potatoes. Which is actually a bit strange, because in both countries potatoes appeared on the table relatively recently — less than 200 years ago. They largely replaced groats, and, to some extent, bread as … Read more

Cicer cum caule

  Here is the full translation: Since Christmas is just around the corner, here is traditional Polish Christmas Eve cabbage. INGREDIENTS:250 g dried whole peas500 g sauerkraut40 g dried mushrooms150 g dried apples (whole slices)250 g smoked plums150 g dried apples (sliced)50 ml hemp oil PREPARATION:Soak the peas for about 8 hours and cook until … Read more

Fake Fish In Almond

Fish used to be an important part of the diet during fasting. However, this did not come from biblical tradition, but from Hippocrates’ humoral medicine. A key element of fasting was overall restraint. Fasting was not only abstaining from certain foods, but also a spiritual fast — holding back impulses, cultivating a kind of emotional … Read more

How To Make Fake Fry Fish

Christmas Eve in Poland means fish flavors.Even if it’s just herring and carp, there must be fish. Herring, the basic fish of Hamburg and North German street food (Fischbrötchen, the classic fish-in-a-bun), is a people’s fish — staple food for fishermen and villagers along the Baltic and North Sea coasts for centuries. In plant-based cooking, … Read more

Oat Borscht

For about fifteen hundred years, borscht has been one of the foundations of Polish and, more broadly, East Slavic cuisine. Originally made from fermented leaves of Heracleum sphondylium (which gave the dish its name), it later came to mean soups prepared on various types of sour starters — that is, fermented vegetables. Today the most … Read more

Saint Hyacinth of the Dumplings

On the internet, you can find everything you’re capable of imagining—and plenty of things you’re absolutely not.One of them is “culinary Marxism.” The moment I saw the phrase, it stole my heart, and I’ve since enjoyed calling myself a “culinary Marxist.” Whatever that may actually mean. And I found a very intriguing interpretation of the … Read more